1001 Errors in the Christian Bible

Matthew -- Errors 50-56

#50

Matthew 3: (KJV)

14 “But John forbad him, saying, I have need to be baptized of thee, and comest thou to me? 15 And Jesus answering said unto him, Suffer it to be so now: for thus it becometh us to fulfil all righteousness. Then he suffered him.”

The Greek word that “Matthew” uses for “fulfill” is generally the same word used by Matthew to claim fulfillment of prophecies from the Tanakh. There is no prophecy in the Tanakh that the Messiah would be baptized in a river. As far as performing a commandment from the Tanakh there is no commandment requiring baptism in a river as a general type of atoning or purification ritual. A related question is, “who baptized John with water?”

#51
Matthew 3: (KJV)

16 “And Jesus, when he was baptized, went up straightway out of the water:”

The author of Matthew likely copied the story of Jesus’ baptism either from “Mark” or from the same source Mark used. This is the related sentence in Mark:

Mark 1: (KJV)

9… “and was baptized of John in Jordan.10 And straightway coming up out of the water, he saw the heavens opened”

Mark indicates that immediately after Jesus came out of the water the heavens opened. In the Greek Matthew’s sentence structure has joined the adverb “straightway” with the verb “went up” so he is saying that immediately after the baptism Jesus came out of the water. Generally, coming out of the water would signal the end of the baptism. Why would anyone stay in the water after the baptism? Maybe to go swimming or take a bath?

#52
Matthew 3: (KJV)

16… “and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove, and lighting upon him”

In the Greek there is no “the” before “Spirit”. Apparently, whenever Matthew does not say “the” spirit of God/holy spirit Christian translations say “the” spirit of God/holy spirit.

#53

Matthew 4: (KJV)

8 “Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them;”

It would not be possible to see all the kingdoms of the world of a spherical world no matter how high the mountain was. Apparently the author, like most people of his time, mistakenly believed that the earth was flat.

#54

Matthew 4: (KJV)

12 “Now when Jesus had heard that John was cast into prison, he departed into Galilee; And leaving Nazareth, he came and dwelt in Capernaum, which is upon the sea coast, in the borders of Zabulon and Nephthalim: That it might be fulfilled which was spoken by Esaias the prophet, saying,

The land of Zabulon, and the land of Nephthalim, by the way of the sea, beyond Jordan, Galilee of the Gentiles;

The people which sat in darkness saw great light; and to them which sat in the region and shadow of death light is sprung up.”

Misquote. “Matthew’s” translation doesn’t agree with the Masoretic text or Greek translations of the Tanakh. Isaiah 8: (JPS 1917)

“23… Now the former hath lightly afflicted the land of Zebulun and the land of Naphtali, but the latter hath dealt a more grievous blow by the way of the sea, beyond the Jordan, in the district of the nations.
9.1 The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light; they that dwelt in the land of the shadow of death, upon them hath the light shined.”

Isaiah Chapter 8, JPS translation, is referring to the destruction of the kingdom of Israel by the Assyrians. The “former” and “latter” of 8:23 refers to the Assyrians and Samarians:

7:1 “And it came to pass in the days of Ahaz the son of Jotham, the son of Uzziah, king of Judah, that Rezin the king of Aram, and Pekah the son of Remaliah, king of Israel, went up to Jerusalem to war against it; but could not prevail against it. And it was told the house of David, saying: 'Aram is confederate with Ephraim.”

All of Isaiah, chapter 8(JPS), is written in prose. Isaiah chapter 9(JPS), starts out being written in synonymous parallelism poetry:

“The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light;
they that dwelt in the land of the shadow of death, upon them hath the light shined.
Thou hast multiplied the nation,
Thou hast increased their joy;
they joy before Thee according to the joy in harvest,
as men rejoice when they divide the spoil.”

Even though Isaiah 8:23 and 9:1 of JPS refer to different subjects and have different writing styles Christian translations have combined them into the start of Chapter 9 because of Matthew’s misquote which attempted to combine them into evidence of prophecy fulfillment.

#55

Matthew 4: (KJV)

17 "From that time Jesus began to preach, and to say, Repent: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand."

False prophecy.

#56

Matthew 5: (KJV)

31 “It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: 32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”

The author of “Matthew” previously had Jesus say:

5:18 (KJV) “For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.”

Regarding acceptable causes for divorce the Law of Deuteronomy states the following:

24:1 (JPS) “When a man taketh a wife, and marrieth her, then it cometh to pass, if she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some unseemly thing in her, that he writeth her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house, and she departeth out of his house, and goeth and becometh another man's wife, and the latter husband hateth her, and writeth her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, who took her to be his wife; her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled;”

So Jesus stated that he would not change the Law but he did change the Law regarding acceptable causes for divorce.

EXODUS STAGE RIGHT

Excerpt from the Bible of “The Sons Of Catty Elders”

“In fact, Exodus never occurred as described in the Jewish Torah.
In actuality, it was just one of those racist 40's “on the road” films
“Exodus, Stage Right” starring Jack Benny, Bing Crosby and Bob
Hope (all well known Zionists).”

(Excerpt from “Exodus, Stage Right”)

Jack Benny (as Pharaoh) :
Oh Rochester, Rochester, have you seen my Jews?

Rochester :
Yassir boss, Yassir. De’s headed for de Red Sea.

Jack Benny :
Well don’t just stand there Rochester, get in my Maxwell and chase them.

Rochester :
Yassir boss, Yassir.

(Meanwhile, Bing Crosby (as Moses) has just come down from Mt. Sinai.)

Bing Crosby :
Take two of these tablets Hebrew children and bubble your troubles away.

(Bob Hope (as Aaron) is off by himself in the desert trying to get in a round of eighteen before Moses comes back.)

Bob Hope :
I’ve heard of sand traps, but this is ridiculous.

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