1001 Errors in the Christian Bible
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Mark -- Errors 161-167
#161
Mark 5: (KJV)
2 “And when he was come out of the ship, immediately there met
him out of the tombs a man with an unclean spirit,”
Compare to
Matthew 8: (KJV)
28 “And when he was come to the other side into the country of
the Gergesenes, there met him two possessed with devils, coming out of
the tombs,”
It’s clear that “Mark” and “Matthew” are telling
the same story because the wording of the entire stories is extremely
similar. Mark says there was one man coming out of the tombs while Matthew
says there were two. We’ll see there are several other instances
where “Mark” said “one” while “Matthew”
said “two”.
#162
Mark 5: (KJV)
7 “And cried with a loud voice, and said, What have I to do with
thee, Jesus, thou Son of the most high God? I adjure thee by God, that
thou torment me not. 8 For he said unto him, Come out of the man, thou
unclean spirit. 9 And he asked him, What is thy name? And he answered,
saying, My name is Legion: for we are many. 10 And he besought him much
that he would not send them away out of the country. 11 Now there was
there nigh unto the mountains a great herd of swine feeding. 12 And all
the devils besought him, saying, Send us into the swine, that we may enter
into them. 13 And forthwith Jesus gave them leave.”
Compare to:
Matthew 8: (KJV)
29 “And, behold, they cried out, saying, What have we to do with
thee, Jesus, thou Son of God? art thou come hither to torment us before
the time? 30 And there was a good way off from them an herd of many swine
feeding. 31 So the devils besought him, saying, If thou cast us out, suffer
us to go away into the herd of swine. 32 And he said unto them, Go. And
when they were come out, they went into the herd of swine:”
There are many strange aspects of “Mark’s” story here that
“Matthew” has exorcised in his version. Note that in Mark the
demon actually resists Jesus’ initial command to leave, “Come
out of the man, thou unclean spirit”. Matthew saw resistance to Jesus’
commands as a theological impossibility so in his version the demons obey
Jesus’ initial command, “Go”.
#163
Mark 5: (KJV)
21 “And when Jesus was passed over again by ship unto the other
side, much people gathered unto him: and he was nigh unto the sea. 22
And, behold, there cometh one of the rulers of the synagogue, Jairus by
name; and when he saw him, he fell at his feet, 23 And besought him greatly,
saying, My little daughter lieth at the point of death: I pray thee, come
and lay thy hands on her, that she may be healed; and she shall live.”
Compare to:
Matthew 9: (KJV)
18 “While he spake these things unto them, behold, there came
a certain ruler, and worshipped him, saying, My daughter is even now dead:
but come and lay thy hand upon her, and she shall live.”
The wording of the accompanying stories are so similar that the authors
are clearly telling the same story. Yet “Mark’s” version
comes immediately after the “Gerassic Pork” story about the
demoniac while “Matthew’s” version has “The Healing
Of The Paralytic”, “The Call Of Levi” and “The Question
About Fasting” stories in between the “Gerassic Pork” and
“Jairus’ Daughter” stories.
#164
Mark 5: (KJV)
22 “And, behold, there cometh one of the rulers of the synagogue,
Jairus by name; and when he saw him, he fell at his feet, 23 And besought
him greatly, saying, My little daughter lieth at the point of death: I
pray thee, come and lay thy hands on her, that she may be healed; and
she shall live.”
Compare to:
Matthew 9: (KJV)
18 “While he spake these things unto them, behold, there came
a certain ruler, and worshipped him, saying, My daughter is even now dead:
but come and lay thy hand upon her, and she shall live.”
According to “Mark” the daughter was dying and according to
“Matthew” the daughter was dead. That’s typical of Matthew
to upgrade the reported miracles in Mark.
#165
Mark 5: (KJV)
27 “When she had heard of Jesus, came in the press behind, and
touched his garment. 28 For she said, If I may touch but his clothes,
I shall be whole. 29 And straightway the fountain of her blood was dried
up; and she felt in her body that she was healed of that plague. 30 And
Jesus, immediately knowing in himself that virtue had gone out of him,
turned him about in the press, and said, Who touched my clothes?”
Compare to:
Matthew 9: (KJV)
20 “And, behold, a woman, which was diseased with an issue of
blood twelve years, came behind him, and touched the hem of his garment:
21 For she said within herself, If I may but touch his garment, I shall
be whole. 22 But Jesus turned him about, and when he saw her, he said,
Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole. And the
woman was made whole from that hour.”
In “Mark” Jesus’ act of healing in this story is an unconscious
act. In “Matthew” it’s a conscious act. As usual “Matthew”
has healed a perceived deficiency in Jesus according to “Mark”.
#166
Mark 6: (KJV)
1 “And he went out from thence, and came into his own country;
and his disciples follow him. 2 And when the sabbath day was come, he
began to teach in the synagogue: and many hearing him were astonished,
saying, From whence hath this man these things? and what wisdom is this
which is given unto him, that even such mighty works are wrought by his
hands?”
Compare to:
Matthew 13: (KJV)
53 “And it came to pass, that when Jesus had finished these parables,
he departed thence. 54 And when he was come into his own country, he taught
them in their synagogue, insomuch that they were astonished, and said,
Whence hath this man this wisdom, and these mighty works?”
Mark 6:1 comes right after the healing of the dead daughter. “Matthew”
gives the same story in Chapter 9. Matthew 13:53 tells the same story
as Mark 6:1 yet has about 4 chapters of stories in between that “Mark”
doesn’t.
#167
Mark 6: (KJV)
5 “And he could there do no mighty work, save that he laid his
hands upon a few sick folk, and healed them.”
Compare to:
Matthew 13: (KJV)
58 “And he did not many mighty works there because of their unbelief.”
“Mark” states that Jesus could not do mighty work. In typical
“Matthew” style, Matthew undoes a Markan limitation on Jesus
and says that Jesus chose not to do mighty works.
The Parable Of The Chocolate Chip Cookie
A man ran up to Jesus and said, “Teacher, the Prophets with one voice
affirm that atonement is achieved through good deeds, repentance and forgiveness
by God. Can any of these by themselves achieve atonement or all required?”
Jesus answered, “Achieving atonement is like achieving a chocolate
chip cookie. Good deeds are like the sweetness of chocolate chips, and
the more one uses the better the cookie. Repentance is like the abundance
of cookie dough, but using too much of it will make you and especially
those around you sick. Forgiveness is like heat, you can’t see it,
you can only feel it. If you use only chocolate chips and cookie dough
you will create an unpleasant lump deep inside the son of man that will
last three days. If you use only cookie dough and heat no one else will
want your cookies so you will have to eat all of them yourself and won’t
be able to pass through the doors to the Temple let alone the eye of a
needle. If you use only chocolate chips and heat you will end up with
a big chocolate mess.” From then on no one dared eat anything other
than oatmeal-raisin cookies.